Chapter Three: Never Want to See You Again
The Daoist of Ascension was utterly dejected, his face steeped in utter despair. He had once believed himself the greatest victor, only to discover he was nothing more than a clown.
After so much effort, he had finally obtained a divine technique of heaven and earth, only to find he could not learn it. It was like a man collapsing in the desert, only for a scantily clad beauty to appear before him, holding a glass of water—yet she simply wouldn’t let him drink. How could anyone not be tormented by such agony?
It was bad enough that he couldn’t master the divine skill, but now, to add insult to injury, he—an eminent figure of the Sealing Heaven Realm—had been reduced to someone else’s subordinate.
Truly, he had tried to steal a chicken and ended up losing the rice. With a self-mocking laugh, the Daoist of Ascension resigned himself to fate. Since things had come to this, he needed to make plans for his future.
He turned around, intending to speak with Shen Wan about his own arrangements. But the moment he turned, his face turned green with shock.
There was Shen Wan, shaking a crank in his hand, tending to a roasting crocodile!
“Damn it! That’s a celestial-grade spirit beast, and he’s roasting it just like that?”
Shen Wan hummed a little tune, then rifled through the pile of “junk” the Daoist had left on the ground, pulling out a few more books and casually tossing them onto the fire.
Watching his belongings burn, the Daoist’s heart bled—those things were his entire fortune! He timidly approached Shen Wan and cast another glance at the roaring flames. “Ah, my heart aches…”
“Elder.”
At the sound of his voice, Shen Wan turned his head.
“What is it? Finished reading?”
“Yes… This old servant has pondered it many times, but I’m completely at a loss.” With great reluctance, he handed the golden scroll back to Shen Wan.
Shen Wan took the scroll, sneering inwardly: “Hmph, you won’t catch me in your trap. Let’s see what you do now.”
“Elder, I believe this divine technique is indeed difficult…”
But before he could finish, Shen Wan flicked his wrist and tossed the scroll into the fire, where it sizzled and vanished in a flash.
The Daoist of Ascension was stunned.
“That was a divine technique of heaven and earth! Even if you can’t learn it, couldn’t you have used it to found a sect or something? And why—why can something nurtured by the heavens be burned to nothing by ordinary fire?”
“It’s useless to keep it. As firewood, at least it serves some purpose,” Shen Wan replied offhandedly, still turning his crank.
The Daoist felt that this book should have been titled *The Supreme Cosmic Prodigal*, which would suit this little scoundrel’s character far better!
Otherwise, it would simply be an insult to this brat’s very nature.
He took a deep breath and cast a calming spell on himself, finally steadying his mind. Otherwise, he was afraid he might lash out at the boy again.
“Elder… this Sea Valley Ice Crystal Crocodile is a celestial-grade spirit beast—even without awakening its spiritual roots, ordinary fire can’t possibly cook it.”
He was trying to hint to Shen Wan to stop wasting his time and resources, but Shen Wan, looking at him, nodded in perfect agreement.
“You have a point. Why don’t you fetch me your sword? If I skin it first, it’ll cook more easily.”
“Oh, and do you have any seasoning? Bring me some.”
The Daoist cast not one but three calming spells on himself. Though his fists were clenched and his body trembled, he managed to hold everything in.
He gazed at the little crocodile on the spit, his eyes brimming with sympathy.
The silly little crocodile glanced at him and shed a tear…
…
Shen Wan watched the sun sinking toward the horizon, feeling a touch of chill on his skin. Everything that could burn had burned, and the fire was out.
The little crocodile was still tied to the spit, belly up—unscathed, yet staring listlessly at the ground, utterly despondent.
Shen Wan lay on the ground. It had only been half a day without his phone, yet he already felt disconnected from the world.
He glanced at the Daoist of Ascension, who was actually sitting cross-legged with eyes closed, meditating.
“Old man, do you know where this is?”
Shen Wan had no intention of being polite to this old charlatan.
The Daoist’s eyelid twitched, but he answered, “The Endless Sea, the intersection of the three continents of Sealing Heaven Realm—a dead sea, more or less.”
“At a time like this, can’t you just tell me the truth? Honestly, if you claimed this was the Pacific Ocean, I’d believe you.”
“Pacific Ocean? Where is that? This old servant doesn’t know.”
“Damn!”
The little crocodile kept staring at the ground, not even blinking. A crab was watching it from below.
“So, are you an immortal?”
“This old servant is at the mid-stage Soul Pill realm. There are no immortals in the Sealing Heaven Realm—they’re all in the Outer Realms.”
“…”
“Do you know how to get out of here?”
“Just ride a sword.”
“…”
Shen Wan sprang to his feet, looking at the old charlatan in exasperation.
“Is it so hard for you to just give me a straight answer?”
The Daoist opened his eyes, confused by Shen Wan’s annoyance.
“Elder, what do you mean by that?”
“Never mind. Since you won’t talk straight, come on—ride your sword. I want to see how far you can fly!”
“Elder, I have already signed a servant’s contract with you. I cannot go far from your side.”
“What, you’re afraid I’ll pine for you? Tell me how to break the contract—I’ll let you go. Go as far as you damn well can!”
The Daoist’s brows furrowed. He thought, “Your cultivation is higher than mine. If you want to break the contract, you just have to say so. Are you playing with me?”
Nevertheless, he stood up hesitantly. “Elder, do you mean it?”
“Stop wasting words. Just tell me!”
Shen Wan felt that his intelligence was being trampled by this old charlatan, but the Daoist gritted his teeth and continued, “Elder, all you need to do is silently recite in your heart: ‘From this day forth, I willingly dissolve the servant’s contract with the Daoist of Ascension and return him his freedom—Heaven and Earth bear witness.’ That will suffice.”
Without hesitation, Shen Wan closed his eyes and began to recite:
“From this day forth, I willingly dissolve the servant’s contract with the Daoist of Ascension and return him his freedom—Heaven and Earth bear witness.”
As soon as the words were finished, a flash of light crossed Shen Wan’s forehead, and a drop of blood floated out slowly.
The blood paused, then flew straight to the Daoist’s forehead and merged into it.
The Daoist let out a long, exultant cry, feeling an unprecedented sense of liberation—a freedom beyond compare.
He cast a sharp, piercing glance at Shen Wan.
“I swear to Heaven, I never want to see you again for the rest of my life!”
With that, he flicked his sleeve, summoned a longsword, and with a tap of his toe, soared onto its blade.
A rainbow streaked across the sky as the Daoist of Ascension disappeared into the distance.
The sky had darkened; the breeze was turning chill.
Shen Wan stood on the shore, gazing into the distance, utterly stunned.
“He really… rode his sword and flew away?”
Something about it all seemed wrong, but he couldn’t put a finger on what.
He looked at the little crocodile still tied to the spit and shouted toward the departing Daoist, “What about this crocodile?”
“I have already dissolved my contract with it. It is free now. From this day forth, we go our separate ways!”
The Daoist’s voice echoed from the sky, hollow and fading, ever more distant…
Shen Wan stood there, dumbfounded, questioning everything.
…
Stars twinkled in the dusky night sky.
Shen Wan sat by the shore, gazing at the silent expanse of the sea, unable to calm his heart as he pondered the events of the day.
“He really is an immortal! What have I missed?!”
Regret gnawed at him, and for the first time, he understood the profound importance of respecting one’s elders.
He glanced at the silly little crocodile beside him, still lying motionless on the spit.
“Hey, little croc.”
The crocodile shivered involuntarily.
“Can you take me away from here?”
The little croc trembled.
“Do you know how?”
After a moment’s thought, the crocodile shook itself free of the ropes, landing on the ground. Its body swelled manifold until it towered above Shen Wan. After a long hesitation, it opened its colossal jaws.
Shen Wan jumped in fright. He hadn’t seen it shrink before, when he’d crawled out from its mouth earlier.
This only confirmed his suspicion: the old man who’d flown away was undoubtedly an immortal.
He had truly missed out.
Regret overwhelmed Shen Wan, but there was no point in lamenting over what was done. For now, it was best to leave this place as soon as possible.
After some thought, he climbed back into the giant crocodile’s mouth, followed closely by a little crab.
The giant crocodile closed its jaws, a single tear sliding from its eye, and slowly made its way to the sea, slipping silently into the endless waters.